The Love we Are Having ♥

Permenent Resident

My PR is back..
A big big one this time and is super painful
I can't burst it though is riped. So irritating...

Hmm.. More birthdays coming up and i think i'm going so so broke soon. hehe

Today attempted some test and i did fairly well i suppose.
Presentation sux because i didn really prepare for it.

Watched ghost of girlfriend's past and it's worth the money.
Learn a few things in the movie as well.
Above Love and not being a total bitch in future. haha..

next week onwards i will have my 1 month survivor training course in ICU.
It's going to be tough and i won't be able to have so much fun by then. Sianz..
I have to pull through it no matter wad.

Wish me luck ppl.
Love you too

We are unbreakable.... ,

It has been a daily routine for me.
Work - eat- sleep everyday.

Been adapting well at work so far for now, ppl there are nice and helpful as well.
But somehow i find myself blur out there and had been quiet around them.
everyday is a learning experience for me and i ought to study and gain even more knowledge to survive for these one year.

Dearie had always been behind me supporting with what i am doing.
I really ought to love him even more and am trying my very best to do it.
He's got such a kind soul to even accept for the imperfect me which always upsets him, and i am really sorry for what i've done.
I'm going to spent more time with him whenever i can and i think he is the only person that would not be hurting me.

Sometime i just wish that i'm just a purely white paper that is only able to be written all my happy memories without unhappiness, fears and worries.

I'm really glad that ppl who treasures me stays by my side all this while listening to all me complains or those who makes me smile. you guys are very very very super duper important to me. So don't you ever leave me even though i think some might even do that one day.

I think i had put in effort into one of the friendship, but will this friend even treasure it?
Can this person feels it at all?
For this i'm not sure and i try not to think about it as well.
Too much hope will be a disappointment at the end so i'll just be mutual and don't bother.

I'm just a stubborn and naive girl that this habit that i can't change. hahahahaha...

We are unbreakable.... ,

Is only the Beginning...

Work = No life. That's wad ppl had been saying and i truly believe it.

Life in ICU had been hectic and hard to adapt for me.
I've got to know my theory and patient well.
Today had been the most stressful and unhappy day for me.
Does Anyone know how i truely felt?
Feeling all lonely and no one to rely on during work because i'm new there.
I have given 3 months of probation.
Always asking myself if i'm able to pass it through
How i wish i'm like some of the others who is genius with their theories.
I wish to be them.
It really false me to tell myself tmr will be a better day for me though.

Deep down in my heart i felt like crying but there's no tears inside me.
Somebody, whoever just make me cry out pls...
It's really suffocating inside me, can't breathe at all, heart is feeling so heavy.
Should i just suppress wad's inside me and forget about it?
For this moment, I just want to vanish off into thin air.
I just want to disappear.

However on the other hand,

Being strong physically is a must for me right now.
I can't just collapse and wait for people to clean up my mess.
Regi got to stand up strong and be the mighty warrior again
I've got to find my competitiveness back for work.
it's for my future and i got to build it up strong and steady.
No matter how tough is the situation i can fight for the victory.
got to believe and be confident.

This is only the beginning. Am i up for the challenges that has been laid before me?

We are unbreakable.... ,